#2 I’m feeling so cold even though I’m under the blanket. #9 If I were with you right now, where would you want me to touch you? #11 My hands were busy, but they took a break to text you. #13 I’m trying to sleep, but I can’t stop thinking about all the things you could do to me if you were with me right now. #18 What would you want to do with me after our date tomorrow?
It’s too direct and as exciting as it seems, it’s still boring because you leave nothing to surprise.
Sometimes I'll respond and sometimes, well, I won't. I'm not intending to be a tease—I'm not—but it's the equivalent of making heavy eye contact at a bar, approaching the woman, standing next to her..then just awkwardly standing in silence. Yes, it's certainly possible to elevate the banter, but that brings us to the next issue…Men are ready to meet women right away, but most women need some back-and-forth. Somewhere between 10 percent and 95 percent of all men are creepy and should be avoided.
A woman once opened with, "Hey Jeff, you look sporty—tell me something clever to say at my Super Bowl party on Sunday please." This was a pretty great opening. I understand the frustration: My behavior makes no sense. This means that the Tinder chitchat is an audition, of sorts, to see if men have wit.
Flirty, flattering, cheeky, and it gave a conversational hook. We're doing it on speculation, hoping that we'll pass the audition and meet in person. Once we start messaging, there are three possible scenarios: (1) We could meet and go out. (3) The woman never really wanted to go out in the first place but sort of messes around on Tinder for fun.
(This last category is the female equivalent of what I'm doing—we should date.) Because No. 3 are a very real possibility, this introduces an element of risk: The whole enterprise could be a waste of time.