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And the truth is that I have gravitated toward black men above other races not because of any fetish or imagined cultural match but because, more often than not, I found myself drawn to relationships with them because they praised my imperfections, didn’t critique them.
So when Ernest Baker wrote “The Reality of Dating White Women When You’re Black,” posing the question – – I had to also ask myself, “Why do I date black men?
Simone Jacobson is a Burmese American writer, performer, teaching artist, and cultural worker based in Washington, D. Unlike many first generation Asian Americans, my mom’s first language was English.
My grandpa’s father was Chinese and my grandma’s father was British; both of their mothers were Burmese.
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” While Baker’s essay rehashed familiar and stale conversations about interracial dating, perpetuating single-race binaries, it also forced me to explore where my personal preferences for black male partners originated.
Was it because the freckled redhead in grade school never gave me so much as a look while the brown boys awoke every cell in my body with just one glance?
After a decade of back-to-back monogamous relationships throughout my 20s—first with a white Frenchman (three years), then with a black Jamaican Belizean American (five years)—I went on an online dating binge to get over a bad breakup with the latter.
After many continuous, failed attempts at love in the digital space, I was left disappointed and slightly lonelier than when I began.